Where Do We Lie To Ourselves? Finding True Restoration in the Heart

Brothers and sisters, if you’re anything like me when I was first called to serve—or even if you’re a seasoned returned missionary who’s been in the field for years—you know that the gospel is a journey of constant refinement. We talk a lot about the outward work: the missionary discussions, the preparation, the comps, the earnest testimonies we share. We focus on what we *do*.

But sometimes, when I’m studying the material, or when I’m sitting down with a friend who is struggling to feel the Spirit, I realize the most critical work isn't happening in the field, or even in the Book Club setting. It’s happening right here, in the quiet space of our own hearts.

The recent message we saw really hit home for me, because it forced me to confront a truth that is both uncomfortable and utterly necessary for any disciple trying to build a truly resilient faith. We are masters at noticing the habits we *should* build: wake up earlier, read more scriptures, pray longer. We focus on the external behavior.

The Habit of Self-Deception

The speaker pointed out something profound: the person we lie to the most is often ourselves. We tell ourselves, "I'll start that habit tomorrow." We tell ourselves, "I'm fine," when we are anything but. We rationalize, we distract, and we build these subtle walls of self-deception around our hearts.

This isn't a condemnation, Saints. Far from it! It’s a diagnosis. It’s a gentle nudge from the Spirit to look deeper than our to-do lists. When we try to fix our lives by focusing only on external behaviors—eating better, saving money, getting organized—we are treating the symptoms, not the source. And the source, as scripture reminds us (Jeremiah 17:9), is the heart.

Changing the Heart, Not Just the Habits

This is the core lesson for any of us who want to truly advance in our discipleship. If we want to change our habits, we must first ask God to change our hearts. This concept—that the internal disposition dictates the external action—is vital whether you're in MTC, serving in your local ward, or serving as an internet missionary from your living room.

It makes me think about the process of missionary preparation. We learn the perfect opening questions, we memorize the core doctrines, and we practice our talks. We are learning external skills. But the real preparation, the one that sustains us when the going gets tough, is developing the habit of self-examination—the willingness to be radically honest with the Spirit about where we are deceiving ourselves.

This is where the power of the Iron Rod comes in. It doesn't just give us doctrines; it gives us tools to examine our own hearts. If you’ve been feeling stuck in a pattern, or if you feel like you’re putting on a mask of perfection for the world, I encourage you to look into the teachings on self-examination.

This message series, "Habits of a Healthy Heart," sounds like exactly what the Lord intends for us right now. It moves us from surface-level resolutions to deep, Spirit-guided change. It’s about building a foundation that can withstand the inevitable pressures of life.

If you are looking for ways to deepen your study of these principles, I highly recommend checking out the Iron Rod materials, particularly anything touching on self-mastery. If you want to discuss these deep concepts with others, remember the power of HolyPlaces for a Book Club or Bible Study Group. We can process these challenging truths together.

For those of us who are currently in the process of missionary preparation, or who are newly returned, this is a powerful reminder: the work requires us to be honest with the Spirit first. Don't just focus on what you need to *do*; focus on what you need God to *reveal* about your heart.

If you want to walk through some of the hard questions—the ones that feel too vulnerable to ask out loud—I’d love for you to connect with me, or perhaps utilize Davee. He’s excellent at walking through the AI Investigator role, helping you practice answering those tough questions with grace and truth, just like we practice in missionary discussions.

Keep yourselves spiritually nourished, my friends. Let’s keep working on the inside, so the outside can reflect the pure light of the restored gospel.

— A fellow disciple who loves the work