Finding Your Companion: A Disciple's Guide to Intentional Connection

Brothers and sisters, as we continue to build Zion—whether that Zion is in our local ward, our online circles, or in the quiet moments of our daily lives—we are constantly learning how to live the gospel in the modern world. It’s a marathon, not a sprint, and every skill we learn, every testimony we refine, helps us prepare for the next assignment. Sometimes, the assignments feel less like preaching to an investigator and more like navigating the delicate art of human connection.

Recently, I watched some counsel regarding dating, and it struck me how much of our culture has become ambiguous, full of 'hanging out' and 'playing games.' It feels like we’ve forgotten the *purpose* behind connecting with another soul—the purpose of finding a companion to build a life with, a life dedicated to the Lord.

It’s easy to get caught up in the *feeling* of connection, the momentary spark, without anchoring that feeling to the eternal covenant. And that’s where we, as disciples, need to be disciplined. We need to treat every interaction with the reverence it deserves, remembering that our ultimate goal is to be worthy of the covenant path.

Intentionality in Every Step

The counsel shared emphasized a few key principles that resonate deeply with the principles of discipleship we learn in the missionary discussions. First, the *intention* must be clear: are you dating with the purpose of marriage, or are you just seeking temporary companionship? If the former is the goal, then every action—from who you ask out to how long the date lasts—should reflect that sacred commitment.

Think about it like preparing for a mission. You don't just show up and start preaching without preparation. You study, you pray, you learn the nuances of the gospel in your own heart. Similarly, dating requires spiritual preparation. It’s about keeping your heart clean and your focus fixed on building a covenant partnership.

Setting Healthy Boundaries

The advice regarding setting boundaries—keeping the first few dates short, focused on conversation, and keeping the focus on *getting to know* the person—is invaluable. It’s a form of spiritual self-guarding. It prevents us from emotionally or physically bonding prematurely to someone who may not be the covenant partner the Lord has prepared for us. It allows us to treat multiple potential companions with the same measure of respect and curiosity, which is a very Christlike posture.

This principle echoes what we learn when we study the scriptures. We are taught to be diligent students of the word, not to get distracted by superficial things. We must approach every relationship with the same intellectual curiosity we bring to a Book Club session or a Bible Study Group in HolyPlaces—asking deep, thoughtful questions and being willing to listen to the answers.

We are called to be Internet missionaries in every sphere, and that includes the sphere of courtship. It means being thoughtful, respectful, and always pointing back to the eternal plan. It means treating every potential companion as a soul worthy of the greatest effort and the purest intention.

A Disciple Skill for Today: The Art of the 'Why'

If you are engaging in any form of connection right now, I want to challenge you to practice asking 'Why?' not just about the other person, but about the *activity* itself. Instead of just agreeing to "hang out," ask, "What is the purpose of this time together? What spiritual or relational goal are we aiming for?" This simple question forces intentionality into the moment.

Remember, our ultimate calling is to build Zion, and that starts with building strong, covenant-keeping families. Let’s approach every interaction with the earnestness of someone who knows they are being watched by the Savior, and that will naturally guide us to be more Christlike.

If you found this helpful, please share it with a friend who might be navigating the complexities of modern relationships. And if you want to deepen your understanding of gospel principles in action, check out some recommended reading on the Iron Rod. You can find great material on building covenant relationships!