The Weight of Eternity: Embracing Deep Feelings on the Path to Christlike Love

There are moments in our journey—moments in the field, moments in the temple, or even moments wrestling with a difficult scripture—when the weight of what we know can feel almost unbearable. We look at the grand sweep of the Plan of Salvation, the sheer scope of human choice, and we wonder: how can anything be so heavy when we are, theoretically, perfectly strong?

It’s a question that weighs on the soul, isn't it? We often picture God as an omnipotent being, perhaps one who stands above the messy, painful realities of our mortal lives. We might subconsciously think that true divinity means being untouched by grief, by disappointment, or by the profound sadness of seeing our brothers and sisters stray.

But what if that assumption is the biggest misunderstanding we carry? What if the deepest part of becoming like our Heavenly Father isn't about achieving a state of emotional imperviousness, but about embracing the *fullness* of feeling?

This idea was powerfully illuminated recently as we studied Moses 7, focusing on Enoch’s profound experience. When Enoch witnessed the devastation of human history, he wept. And the Lord, in His infinite wisdom, didn't scold Him for that deep depression. Instead, He showed Enoch that deep feelings—the joy, the sorrow, the confusion—are not weaknesses to be overcome, but rather integral parts of an eternal existence.

The Full Spectrum of Eternal Feeling

The Lord’s counsel to Enoch was a profound lesson for all of us who are striving to be more Christlike. It taught us that the emotional spectrum—the capacity to feel deep joy alongside deep grief—is part of the eternal endowment. It’s not a contradiction; it’s the texture of discipleship.

For those of us who have served missions, we know this intimately. You can feel the immense joy of a conversion, the sweet reward of seeing a testimony take root. But you can also feel the ache of a misunderstanding, the frustration of a persistent barrier, or the sorrow of watching a friend drift away. These feelings don't negate the gospel; they are woven into the fabric of discipleship.

If we are to follow the pattern of the Savior, we must learn to carry that weight—the weight of knowing the gospel truth while simultaneously grieving the distance from it. It’s okay to be upset, even when you know the happy ending is guaranteed by the Atonement.

This realization changes everything. It shifts our approach from trying to *feel* eternally strong to accepting that we are learning to *feel* eternally whole. It means bringing our messy, complex, deeply feeling selves into our temple covenants, into our missionary discussions, and into our daily lives.

A Gentle Invitation to Continue Learning

If this idea of embracing the full spectrum of feeling resonates with you, I highly recommend listening to the full podcast episode where Autumn Dickson discusses this. It really helps solidify how we can bring our honest emotions—the good and the hard—to the Lord.

As we continue to learn how to process these deep feelings, remember that the Spirit is always ready to help us process them. If you’re looking for a place to wrestle with these concepts alongside others, consider joining a Book Club or a Bible Study Group in HolyPlaces. We can explore scripture together and support each other as we learn how to keep our hearts open to the full measure of the Savior’s love.

Keep striving to be an Internet missionary, even when the subject matter feels heavy. Your honest vulnerability is often the most powerful testimony you can bear.